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Published : February 25, 2008 |
Author : Ms CYPRAH
Category : Self Improvement | Total Views
: 263 | Unrated
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Ms CYPRAH
ELAINE SIHERA (nicknamed Ms CYPRAH or Cyber-Oprah by friends , Emotional Health and Wellbeing Adviser and Diversity Management Consultant, is a British writer, media contributor, internet agony aunt and columnist
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<b>Learn something new every single day of your life.</b> It was Mahatma Gandhi who said: <i>"Live as though you will die tomorrow and learn as though you will live forever."</i> Powerful encouraging words for our development that demonstrate the importance of learning to the quality of our lives. Trawl the Internet for information, it is the greatest repository of trivia and facts in existence, and put that knowledge to good use. If you feed your body and consider it essential, why not your brain as well? It has to do most of the work.
You might have heard that knowledge is power but, for me, that is not so. To have knowledge without doing anything about it might make you more aware, but you will be no better down the line. <b>What is truly powerful is applied knowledge, acting upon that information to make it work for you or others.</b> While I was researching for my books, the greatest joy was seeing what other people thought about the subjects covered; being able to reject, ignore or accept their opinions and to compare them with mine to give a more balanced view. There is nothing to beat that when we are educating ourselves. Recent research has found that people who read a lot and keep an active mind are less prone to Alzheimer’s disease. So keeping our brains fed and watered obviously affects our bodies too.
<b>Emphasise Your Strengths</b> Keep away from focusing on your perceived weaknessess. Give yourself credit for everything you attempt, whether successful or not. At least you made the effort when you could easily have resisted. By focusing on what you can do, your efforts are applauded instead of just the end product. Starting from a base of what you should, and can, do also helps you to live within the bounds of your limitations while gradually extending them in a comfortable way. Make a list of the things you do well or want to learn, attempting one of them every day or week. It is easy to forget the things you are highly competent at doing, especially when you get little positive feedback.
Continued frustration and having to attempt things we dread, or have real difficulty with, can lead to feelings of inadequacy, especially when our success is dependent upon the approval of others. We then place all our value in their hands and sometimes wait in vain for their feedback. But if that reinforcement is not forthcoming from the significant others around us, and in the form we expect, it will destroy our positive feelings. Relying upon such feedback is what children do out of necessity, because they do not have the inner resources, maturity and life experience adults have. Being older, we have to learn how to create and maintain confidence by emphasising the things we value and appreciate in ourselves, whether it is our own names, customs, successes or endeavours. Surround yourself with positive people because negative ones will never see your perspective and will only drag you down in their own emotional mire and negativity.
<b>Set Realistic Goals</b> Live purposefully and with clear goals. Often fear kills our motivation when we decide to dream big and so we become overwhelmed by the sheer thought of its development and what it might mean to our lives. You should always start with the basics, very simply, and progress slowly in that way. It means setting realistic goals for YOU, no one else, because you are the one who will have to work at them and achieve them. Set goals that will meet your expectations. Small incremental successes over time will gradually improve your capabilities, self-belief and self-worth. Avoid making the same mistakes again by learning from them, while remembering that every setback makes you wiser and stronger. Keep your focus on the substance, not just on the form or the glossy structures. Any failure simply means you are not successful yet, but your turn will definitely come if you have the faith, resilience and the patience, and also take time out for self-development. |
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